


Darkness Exists to Make Light Truly Count

by TheEntireFangirl



Category: Salt to the Sea - Ruta Sepetys
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-14 01:46:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17499278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheEntireFangirl/pseuds/TheEntireFangirl
Summary: Brief fic elaborating on the end of Salt to the Sea. My way of getting closure after staying up way to late reading the book, staying up for another hour after that because I was too emotional to go to bed, and then waking up and only thinking about the book.





	Darkness Exists to Make Light Truly Count

**Author's Note:**

> As mentioned in the description, this is just kinda an elaboration on the end of Salt to the Sea. I do want to give credit to Ruta Sepetys, but this is also heavily inspired by the song Uneven Odds by Sleeping At Last, so I have to give them credit too. Even the title is a lyric in the song. I would 100% recommend listening to that before reading this, but also just listening to it in general because it's an amazing song.

**JOANA**

After the wreck of the  _Wilhelm Gustloff_ , Florian and I went to Kiel as planned. The wreck was a great place to start over and we were able to get new papers with lives attached to them. Still, we lived humbly and searched for Anni, Florian's sister.

The war ended later that year. After that, we were able to live more freely. We visited Lithuania and searched for my mother.

We found neither of our families, but time created a new family. Florian and I were raising Halinka, even through the cold and even through the war. We both grew older, finding a new path. We searched for Klaus's family after that, and, again, found nothing.

We had no homes. No families, other than our patchwork quilt of a family. We had no reason to stay and all the reasons to go.

We went to America. It was easy: we were among thousands travelling there after the war. We settled in a midwestern town, learned the language, made friends. We married there. I became a nurse. Florian did physical labor on a farm until he got a job at a museum as a restorer for paintings, and we had a fairly happy life from then on. Halinka grew up learning English, but I she learned German as well and understood some Lithuanian. I was always upset that I could not teach her Polish, like her mother.

**FLORIAN**

Time passed slowly at first, and I made due by relishing in that time when the moments were good. There was much to grieve, much to be sad for, but by finding those good moments, I was able to get by.

Joana and I fell in love, not just with each other, but with our children. That's who they were now: Halinka and Klaus Beck. We asked Klaus if he remembered and wanted to keep his last name, but he said that he wanted his onkel and tante's last name. That's how we raised him to think of us - his aunt and uncle - until one day he started calling us mama and papa. We were a family after that, and eventually, Joana and I had a child of our own, a daughter that we named Lina Anni Beck.

Fear isn't the opposite of happiness. I was always afraid after that. I didn't like loud noises, I didn't like the fireworks they always set off on their independence day. But beyond that fear, maybe even above that fear, I was happy.

I always felt like happiness was waiting, at least.

Fate is a hunter. But if this was my fate, maybe I shouldn't have been so worried about being hunted. Or maybe it was pointless to worry about being hunted because fate would always find you.

I found myself worrying for my children more than myself. I had found my fate, I had gone through my journey, but my children still had yet to meet theirs. I wanted to guide them to what would define their lives.

Halinka grew up happy and loved. Still, when she found out that we were not her birth parents, she always seemed to think something was missing. She became a swimmer, went to Europe, went to Poland and Germany. She tried to find her roots, but they were all but gone.

The day that we told her that we were not her birth parents, I wrote a letter for her. I didn't know when I'd give it to her, only that I'd give it to her went she needed it.

_Dear Halinka,_

_Your birth mother was a brave soul. I knew her briefly, but she was worth everything that you are worth. She risked everything for you, and I could not thank her enough for her sacrifice, as you have brought more joy to my life than I could ever repay. Her name was Emilia._

_Emilia would have trusted me to show you what life is about, but I think you showed me. It is not about the good moments and the bad ones, it is about the good in the bad. There is love even in Hell, as shown by what your mother and I went through, and what you hopefully will not have to go through._

_You have been broken, but mended even stronger. We all have, but you are the one who brings light to all of our lives through the worst of it. You have shown us the strength of love and the peace of forgiveness. You must learn to forgive, however._

_You must learn to forgive Emilia for her sacrifice, and you must learn to thank her for it, even if you are angry. You must learn to forgive your mother and I for not telling you until now. But you must learn to forgive yourself, Halinka, because you have earned anything that you were ever given, ten times over. You are truly the best thing to ever happen - to me and your mother, to Emilia, to your brother and your sister._

_Halinka, you may think that you owe someone something, but you don't. If anything, we owe you for all of the joy, all of the light you have brought into our lives._

_With love and loss,  
Your father_

Halinka was twenty-four-years-old when we got the letter from Clara Christensen.

I gave it to her along with the letter that I wrote.


End file.
